Learning to sail through sh!t smoothly,

Sh!t happens and I am not always agile enough to stay upright and slide through another stimulating shi!tty surprise. Maybe if it were more neatly clumped and scoop-able I could clear it away easier, however, I often perceive my sh!t to be more like the runs. I think it's over, there's a slight ease in the cramping, I relax a little, have a hopeful thought for a respite, then all of a sudden a sharp sting and squeezing of my insides and I am gifted with another chance to accept unexpected sh!t.  Now I’m exhausted, I smell like sh!t and oh my God I am even more behind and I don't even know where to start or how to even begin to catch up!  I'd like to be able to confidently and unapologetically find the foothold, grab the reins, re-mount my horse, and get back to making progress along my path. There are times I will get to that position then while I’m about to ascend my foot finds a pile of little mouse pellet-sized poop. They're so small, yet so many little crappy things combined can feel overwhelming to get past and all I can see is that I have fallen to be surrounded by tiny turds. Getting up again takes concentrated effort and balance to avoid even more contact with the sh!t. I roll my eyes and out comes my sarcastic reactionary defense “ Yes thank you Universe for more sh!t, that is just what I was hoping for, feces of fear!”

Here's some sh!t that has happened to me, have you been dealt some similar sh!t?

Sh!t is when your car that has recently been serviced several times then breaks down and dies on the highway, when you are rushing and you bump into a table and knock over a vase shattering glass everywhere, when you are already late and end up in traffic jam which you had tried to avoid by going a different route, when you are looking forward to having time to yourself and a family member or friend has an emergency and is asking for your help, an unexpected trigger gets under your skin and you wind up re-experiencing emotional pain that you thought you had completely healed, when you succumb to an addiction you have been trying to overcome with the accompanied feelings of guilt and shame. Sh!t is also when the laundry tub overflows because you forgot to move a towel that blocked the drain and someone else in your house discovers the flooding, could be when you go to change a diaper and you find it has failed to contain its expelled contents which have migrated up the back to both shoulders and also across the chest to the chin, or right when you finish mopping the floor, just before you take time to appreciate your cleansing and aesthetically improving efforts, a stamped of muddy soled children ruin the shine. It is also when after months of waiting for a long-anticipated event you wake up with intense cramping and nausea and you realize you will miss it to spend the day in the bathroom.

Sh!t comes in all sizes, it can be as big as losing your job, or as small as spilled coffee down your shirt. Usually, it slides into our life and interrupts our plans and often there is little we can do to prepare for any one of the unlimited possibilities of manifested sh!t.  Well what I have learned and am continuing to ingrain into my brain, is the art of surrender.  An acceptance that I am not the conductor of life, I cannot orchestrate every move I or others make. I still believe in setting goals, although I aspire to remain very mutable to any necessary alterations that may arise. Sh!t sometimes shows up to readjust our position and slide us into a different perspective, precisely perfect for us to proceed with our purpose.

So how can we keep a smile on our face through all the sh!t in our lives?

My suggestion is to try and remember that during these undesirable circumstances, we uncover more of ourselves. We discover the depth of patience we have, and we discover that we really do want to be the version of ourselves that is willing to drop our plans and be there for one another. We find we can conjure up hope even when it seems there has been a sh!t storm specially prepared for us. Maybe we realize that losing a job we dreaded going to was a blessing in disguise pushing us to take a journey to find another path and one that would allow us to live out our purpose happily.  Some sh!t is meant to shake us up and drop us on our heads, so we have to figure out a whole new way to shake it off, find footing, and maneuver around it.  Your increased agility and mobility skills will astound you and come in handy in the future. Hopefully, we can come through it all with a smile, we can’t constipate away our cow pies. So when you find you have stepped in one, I hope you can appreciate the humor and the unavoidable messiness of life.

We all have our own sh!t to deal with and I certainly do not want to compare size, texture, consistency, scent, or who consumed the most roughage. A sh!t contest, really? Sh!t is sh!t, is sh!t. We all have it. If we allow it to, it can poke at our pain, ignite our insecurities, challenge our acceptance of ourselves, and can turn a hopeful happy mood into an overwhelmed frustrated fearful one.  This happens because unfortunately we often react to it the same way we have reacted to other similar sh!t.  Brains sort of suck that way with how efficient they are in their ability to respond, similar sh!t = repeated reaction. You don’t have to say “f#*k!!” because you stubbed your toe or spilled your coffee, you could give yourself some love, grab a towel and listen, maybe your soul is requesting you to slow down, or maybe your body is begging for less caffeine.

I think most people want to be acknowledged for the struggle and strain of their sh!t. Understanding, acceptance, and appreciation are often experienced when we take the time to spotlight our sh!t separately. Shine the light on one dump at a time, while dimming the rest, and fully mourning what is illuminated. Within that mourning we can ask ourselves; what am I feeling?  What has this sh!t stirred up inside? What was I hoping for that the sh!t became an obstacle to achieving??  I suggest we take the time to answer these questions for ourselves and really feel the feelings that they bring up. Sometimes it’s also very helpful to ask a friend if they are willing to offer empathy and then later you can return the love when they are going through their own sh!t. Expressing and sharing our sh!t means we are less likely to become crabby and constipated, or potentially even cruel if we let it stew and get even more stuck inside. When we feel stuck like that we may find ourselves degrading to monkey mentality and start flinging our sh!t at other people! And that’s not pretty, polite, or pleasant.  Actually, it leaves a nasty odor in the air, also perceived as really uncomfortable tension and conflict. I totally admit to sh!t flinging, I do not claim to be above this primal poop reflex, although I am totally down for evolving, are you?